Washington, D.C. – In a series of events that has captivated the White House staff, President Joe Biden has found himself in a battle of wits with a formidable opponent: the TV remote. With Vice President Kamala Harris hitting the campaign trail, the Commander-in-Chief is left to navigate the treacherous waters of modern technology solo, and let’s just say, the struggle is real.

The trouble began last Tuesday evening when President Biden attempted to tune into his favorite news show. According to sources inside the White House, the President ended up accidentally purchasing a season pass for a reality show about competitive cake decorating. “I just wanted to see what’s going on with the economy, and now I’m getting notifications about ‘Cupcake Chaos’ every five minutes,” Biden reportedly exclaimed.

Staffers have described scenes of chaos in the White House living quarters as Biden struggles to figure out what exactly the ‘Input’ button does. “We tried to explain it to him, but then he started reminiscing about the time he first saw color television,” said one aide. “Next thing we know, he’s on the phone with the Smithsonian asking if they have the original RCA remote on display.”

It’s not just the buttons that are causing confusion. With Vice President Harris off on the campaign trail, the President has also had to fend for himself when it comes to choosing what to watch. “Kamala used to set everything up for him, but now we’re getting calls from the West Wing at odd hours,” another staffer confided. “The other night he somehow found himself in a 24-hour loop of C-SPAN coverage of the 1985 Farm Bill debates. He said it was oddly soothing, but we’re a little concerned.”

The situation has reportedly reached a breaking point, with the President’s last straw being his failed attempt to record the newest episode of “60 Minutes.” Instead, he managed to start a Spanish-language telenovela marathon. “I’m learning a lot of Spanish, but I still don’t know if they caught that Wall Street guy,” Biden lamented.

Despite the turmoil, the President is not one to give up easily. White House insiders say Biden has taken to calling his grandchildren for technical support, though they often end up taking over and binge-watching cartoons instead. “At this rate, I’ll know everything about ‘Peppa Pig,’ but I won’t have a clue what Congress is up to,” Biden joked.

As a last resort, the White House is considering assigning a dedicated “Remote Control Czar” to assist the President, though there are concerns this might require a Senate confirmation hearing. In the meantime, staffers are encouraging Biden to stick with Netflix, where the ‘play next episode’ feature has become his new best friend. “At least there are no buttons involved,” one aide quipped.

Whether President Biden will eventually master the elusive remote remains to be seen, but for now, one thing is clear: Kamala Harris’s campaign trail might just be a little smoother than Biden’s quest to watch the evening news.