Have you ever felt like you weren’t deserving of your success? Have you felt like you are an impostor amongst your peers? You may be suffering from Impostor Syndrome, however, a new study conducted at J.C. Mellencamp University that will be released next week reveals you probably are an impostor. 

Over the last 3 years research scientists in the behavioral health department at J.C. Mellencamp University have been hard at work trying to discover ways to help those with Impostor Syndrome. During the study, they witnessed many test subjects who were thought to suffer from Impostor Syndrome actually exhibit signs of real impostors. 

One such subject “Jake” was seen delegating 90% of his work to underpaid staffers in positions below him then turning in the work as his own. He was often seen taking stacks of paper from one side of the room to the other believing that it was actually beneficial. When asked he would say “I feel like such a fraud but I continue to be successful and get these high paying positions of power so I must suffer from Impostor Syndrome, it’s really the only answer. Right?” 

Many felt that Impostor Syndrome was like an opposite Dunning-Kruger effect but now researchers believe we are all probably more stupid than we realize. One research scientist from the experiment who wished to be anonymous said “I’m not even sure if we collected data correctly at this point, sure I’m in my 7th year of higher education but I got most of my answers from Quora so what does that say? Am I even qualified to be talking about this?” It seems as though the answer is probably not and this new research will be sure to create a new level of existential dread that will drag all of us to the bowels of hell within the deep dark recesses of our psyche. 

As society slowly crumbles and decays around us it certainly leaves even this author questioning their abilities and qualifications. As we move forward with knowledge from this new research we should all just assume anyone who seems intelligent and successful is actually just an asshole impostor.